The thing that's most unnerving is how shallow his breathing is -- he's always taking deep breaths, but never getting enough air -- the thing that I wonder but never ask is --is the cancer so filling his lungs that he can't get enough air. And the worst part is a subset of this larger problem: when he laughs, he almost inevitably dissolves into a painful, airless coughing fit; and he loves to laugh we need him, want him to laugh.
